You don't know my struggle until you've felt my pain: The mask of low self-worth!

Has there ever been a time within your life where it seemed as though someone was striving to CONVINCE you that YOU were unhappy?

What is Self-worth? How does one define its foundation of expectancy? Is it in the embedded options that we make? Has one settled without a choice because of the desire to defeat loneliness and confusion? The mask of low self-worth can encompass our spirits, souls, and our minds. When we allow our struggles to beat us, we have chosen to drown in self-pity and loss. Of course, the airs of vulnerability suggest that one would reside in pain, avoid separation versus being alone and deserted.

Although the stop sign of emotions, the green light for avoidance, and the hidden mask of pain embellishes our every desire for our needs, ambitions, and wants, seemingly, the struggle ceases to compromise. What do you do when you do not know what to do? What do you do: when your pain is so intolerable that your breath is slow, yet the daunting aroma of pride and shame filters through your hall of shame? What do you do when the pain becomes your oxygen and the heart that once survived on air now resides in the agony of resentment? Lost, defeated, and tired, the only choice remains to lie down and refuse to get back up. Should one accept the fact that this struggle, this tribulation, is so enormous that there is absolutely no way out? Should an individual throw up their arms of emotional dissatisfaction to walk solely in the gateway of low self-worth?

When your map of life becomes the direct reflection of suffering from a purpose of spiritual destruction, the mask must come off. Human nature will begin to declare an inward war on self. This is a war that paralyzes every effort to move on from the current circumstance. Subsequently, a conscious decision is made for walking into society daily; we must reside beneath the mask of containment. The influences of perceptions lead us to believe that we will get through this if we hide our feelings, keep a smile on our faces, and act as if there is nothing wrong.

As a result, pain overflows our livelihoods; it distracts our reasoning, decisions, and ability to rationalize our truth and our errors. Our very being becomes a deflection of chance as the cancerous pain infiltrates and controls our very existence. Our authenticity becomes questionable because others cannot seem to understand or relate to this different self. When we allow pain to affect our lives within this instance, our self-love is diminished as our motives become questionable.

Jampolsky believed that love lets go of the pain to preserve the heart and our perceptions of self and others. Love forces us to make good choices of positive conduct and reactions. This is the cure for healing and the development of happiness, peace, and joy (2010). In pain, while in a struggle, we must decide that will empower the outcome of emotional security. The main reason we hide behind a mask is to refrain from revealing our true selves. The true self is motivated by love, kindness, and compassion; it carries the weight of the realization that we do not always have it all together. It supplies an opportunity for disclosure, but then the fear of being hurt further or deeper arises.

The thought that we think we are may be comprised of a soggy body of deceased men's bones. The removal of the mask of conciliation becomes the beginning of self-preservation. Hence, a decision is made that we will love ourselves despite. We were meant to grow from our trials, and God's love for us endures forever. Ps. 136:26 inspire, "give thanks to the God of heaven. His love endures forever" (NIV). The failure is not remaining a part of the solution versus maintaining the focus of the illusion. The illusion is of the loneliness, hopelessness, and deprivation of healthy interactions through the denial of self-love, respect, and worth.

To see the real me, I must see the real you and to see the real you. Sometimes it is a reflection of the real me. That can be scary! Why? To deal with self means I have to see things that may reside inside me that are not so pretty, lovable, or worthy. Regardless, real self-worth can only be found in Christ, Ephesians 1:4-6, "for he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love, he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will—to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves" (NIV). Indeed the stop sign of emotions, the green light for avoidance, and the hidden mask of pain will embellish our every desire for our needs, ambitions, and wants; seemingly, the struggle ceases to compromise. When your map of life becomes the direct reflection of suffering from a purpose of spiritual destruction, the mask must dissipate for healing to begin.

When we focus on being a part of the solution and not the illusion, we evolve. It is essential to become vulnerable by maintaining a moderate level of self-disclosure. Allowing others into our personal space reveals our hurt and imperfections, which guides us, individually, to authenticity. We must trust that our self-worth inspires and promotes self-love and respect. The mask of pain will always lead to gain when we choose not to compromise our self-worth for the comfortably of a short spurt of momentary pain.

See you next time,

Lisa Nobles, FAPOP

@d2dlife 2013©


Bible, H. (1984). New international version. Grand Rapids: Zondervan. Retrieved from:

Jampolsky, G. G. (2010). Love is letting go of fear. Random House Digital, Inc. Retrieved from: